It’s over, 4PM today it goes away

3 Sep

Reality came back and now I have confirmation that something tried to develop, but didn’t make it.  No embryo, no embrionic sac, just the same gestational sac a little smaller than 5 days ago.  Timing couldn’t be worse as I have a trip planned to go back to visit family next week with my flight scheduled for 11 PM tomorrow.  I had a few options, like bleeding naturally during my vacation and hoping it comes out, canceling my trip (and missing the wedding on Nantucket that i’ve been looking forward to) and scheduling a D & C for next Wed. or Thurs, or trying to squeeze something in today with a doctor who is ok with me leaving after (as most want you to stay home for 2-3 days after surgery).   My doctor recommend a D & C so she could test the genetics/chromosomes of the pregnancy and find out if it is an unlikely chromosomal abnormality, or if it was a healthy pregnancy with no chromosomal abnormalities.  Oddly I am supposed to hope for the former.  If it is abnormal then it wasn’t meant to be.  If it is healthy, then there is a bigger issue at hand that we haven’t talked about, but I imagine it sounds like a bigger more permanent thing.  Gratefully, after a lot of back and forth and the OB office turning us down for an in-office procedure today, my RE said that she is in surgery today at Stanford and can squeeze me in.  I am so grateful!  That means a lot of good things

  1. I can go on my trip with this behind me (we had to cancel our anniversary trip to Italy for miscarriage #2, so not having to cancel again is great news!)
  2. It is a doctor I actually know and she performed almost the same procedure almost a few months ago.
  3. It is today, no waiting!
  4. I get to be drugged out!  In office with no meds was an experience I NEVER want to repeat.   If given the choice- always get knocked out!   ( I was tempted today to do in office if offered, knowing it might allow me to not miss another long-planned trip.  Why didn’t this happen when I was about to visit my in-laws?  I would have GLADLY cancelled that trip)
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One Response to “It’s over, 4PM today it goes away”

  1. Katie September 3, 2010 at 5:35 pm #

    (((hugs)))

    I am so incredibly sorry.

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