Breathe…it’s over

2 Feb

I am back and feeling better and ready to start over.  It is amazing what some good drugs and a reboot will do to you.  I feel healthy for the first time in a while, no nausea, no fatigue.  It’s the first time I’ve gone the whole day without an hour nap in a while (if you don’t count the drug-induced one I had earlier in the hospital OR).  The next month is healing, forgiveness, acceptance, recovery and just pampering myself with spa trips, retail therapy (like some new houseplants and cookie icing kit), love time with my cat and my patient husband (who needs a clever nickname at this point, how about Mr. Starfish or just Starman? I am sure he’d prefer one of his “cool” online gaming names instead, then anyone that meets up with him online playing Battlefield or Call of Duty can say “hello”) and some pondering on some fun things for the future (just saw that Ricki Martin is going on tour- that guy knows how to put on a show and apparently just became a dad via surrogacy).  This weekend one of my friends is throwing one of his crazy parties again with cocktails galore, and now I have the freedom to just join in and have some fun cocktail in hand.  I ramble. I am weirdly feeling happy and positive, like the bad stuff is over and it’s safe to come out.  Nothing “bad” on the miscarriage front can happen in the next 4 weeks, so I can really relax and breathe.

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4 Responses to “Breathe…it’s over”

  1. Misfits February 2, 2011 at 9:36 pm #

    I’m sorry that this is the outcome, but am relieved that you came out okay. Take whatever time you need. Breathing sounds like a great plan.

  2. Jessica February 3, 2011 at 3:59 am #

    Here from LFCA… Just wanted to send you a hug since you are going through a rough time. Keep being gentle and kind with yourself as you heal. Loss sucks no matter how you experience it…a sad fact I wish none if had to understand.

  3. michelehaytko February 3, 2011 at 5:14 am #

    Here from LFCA with a hug and some warm thoughts…

  4. Foxypopcorn February 3, 2011 at 9:37 am #

    You sound so relieved, and that must feel good. Regardless, I am so sorry for your loss.

    I do like the name Mr Starfish 🙂 He sounds like a great guy.

    Excellent plan of self care. I heartily endorse it.

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