Tales from my High School Reunion

30 Nov

So last Saturday was my 20th high school reunion back in Boston and after MUCH debate on whether or not to go I took the leap.  The tipping point was that Mr. Star actually said that he wanted to go.  In his words “I want to meet all these losers you went to school with” (smirk).   I warned him that I wouldn’t know anyone and it would be totally lame, but figured I’d go since I missed the last two and happened to be in the area for Thanksgiving.  To my complete surprise it was actually a blast.  My worries were completely unfounded.  I felt genuinely happy to see folks and they seemed to be happy to see me.   20 years later it was hard to remember and recognize anyone, never mind worry about social awkwardness and competitiveness.  I didn’t expect the familiar feelings and warmth that filled me.  People I thought I’d hate to see because of whatever grudges from years ago, I actually was thrilled to see and magically could only think of our positive memories.  It helped that we were all well supplied with drinks and it seemed like people had already gone way past the inhibition state by the time I arrived.

What I learned was that just walking in the door I sent the message to my classmates that were there that they mattered enough for me to show up.  I had no idea how grateful people (some I barely remembered) would be to see me.  When we did get to talking I felt an instant level of acceptance and understanding that was completely surprising.

When they did ask about children I didn’t break or fall apart as I’d feared.  I’d seen their Facebook profile pics choc full of kids.  Since it was SO loud in that room I had to yell it like this -“NO KIDS, HOW ABOUT YOU?!”  I got a surprised look back and it seemed like people were eager to change the subject afterwards.  I am sure we were the only couple there that didn’t have at least one.  By age 38, that is kind of what people expect.  Many of my classmates had 3 or more.  One of my classmates told me she had 5 boys!  At the time I was genuinely happy for them, but you know how that stuff feels as it marinates in your brain for a day.  It stings.  I wanted to answer differently and they wanted to hear that I too had kids and that we had that in common.  It was just weird.  But we didn’t have time to dwell since we were mingling among so many people.

Now that a few days have past I look back and feel really proud, like I climbed a mountain.  Despite all my insecurities I lived through my 20th high school reunion and even enjoyed it.   Hopefully I’ll have some better news about new family members by our 25th.  ;  )

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4 Responses to “Tales from my High School Reunion”

  1. Misfit Mrs. November 30, 2011 at 7:20 pm #

    I don’t know if I could make my reunion, also this year. One girl had a 9-year-old at my 10 year, which was hard to imagine bavk then. It is amazing how seeing old friends can warm up that part of you that remembers being young with so much less worry. Glad that the visit home went well and I very much know how you feel when you say how much you miss it. Being the pioneer out there with all the heartache has been a lot for anyone. I feel like these Mexico trips are going to pay off. It simply must. I’d like you to arrive for that 25 year with armloads of babies and enlisting babysitters amongst those former peers.

    • starfishkittydreams November 30, 2011 at 7:30 pm #

      It is so great to hear from you! I am sorry I dropped out of site for a while. It feels good to be back to trying again after sitting on the side lines waiting for treatments and test results.

  2. Amy December 1, 2011 at 5:57 am #

    This is so great to read – I know how hard it is to enjoy things like this, so I think the fact that you did so thoroughly enjoy it (even with the stinging afterward) is HUGE. Give yourself lots of credit for that. Very glad to see that your immunology treatments are producing nearly perfect results! I waited almost a year before we got back to trying and the waiting had me very anxious and sad – it is so helpful to be able do DO things, and I will be keeping every appendage crossed that these treatments are the magic bullets you’ve been seeking!

  3. Her Royal Fabulousness December 2, 2011 at 3:30 pm #

    My reunion was fun too, but very surreal. There were guys I remember being so cute in high school who were so greasy and lecherous. A la Romy and Michelle…

    But, it is a genuine trip to see people who knew you at that young of an age. Glad you took the leap.

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